Dear Christian,
It’s Valentine’s Day!
Don’t worry that you don’t have a Sweetart and aren’t getting any
Kisses. Most of the girls around
her now are probably Nerds and Milkduds anyway. You’re a Mr Goodbar out serving the
Lord. This is a 100 Grand experience
filled with lots of mo-Mentos and everlasting Almond Joy.
Beware in Italy of those young Hot Tamales! You may need to make a Fast Break and
keep your distance. But it’s Up 2 U
(gum) how you React. (gum) But don’t be a DumDum. Righteousness brings a huge Payday!
When you get home you’ll meet some Cuddly Cuties (Valentine
Day Chocolate bear) AND some Airheads.
Then one day you’ll Skor and meet a Bit-O-Honey that will
send you into Orbit (gum) and you’ll see Starbursts. Don’t be a Sucker and Rollo around
looking for Extra Fruit Sensations.(gum)
Those are Twix of the devil.
Wait for the woman whose love is Good & Plenty.
Try not to have Butterfingers when you pull out the Ring
Pop. You’ll be a gread Duo (gum)
and before you know it you’ll have a bunch of Junior Mints running
around. Have lots of Snickers on
your mission. We love you Mounds. XO, your family
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